[ That earns another bout of silence - though not one of shock or anger, just to let it all sink in. Coping by hurting herself. That... had always been how she'd coped with everything back home.
It's the first time it's made the idea of her self-blame possibly not being a reality feel actually believable.
Which is likely why when she opens her mouth to try and say something back, all she ends up doing is crying. She covers her mouth quickly to try and muffle it, but it's hard to really hide. It's not the first time she's cried over it all and it likely won't be the last, but it's hard to not when everything keeps piling on top of itself.
Thinking about home, about Nathan, just makes everything with Rachel feel even more fresh, and it tears her up inside as much as everything else in this town has. ]
How am I supposed to bring her to live with us when she doesn't know but I can't - I can't look at her without thinking about - the smell and the way her face looked and her eyes in those - those fucking pictures?
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Date: 2019-06-11 04:16 am (UTC)It's the first time it's made the idea of her self-blame possibly not being a reality feel actually believable.
Which is likely why when she opens her mouth to try and say something back, all she ends up doing is crying. She covers her mouth quickly to try and muffle it, but it's hard to really hide. It's not the first time she's cried over it all and it likely won't be the last, but it's hard to not when everything keeps piling on top of itself.
Thinking about home, about Nathan, just makes everything with Rachel feel even more fresh, and it tears her up inside as much as everything else in this town has. ]
How am I supposed to bring her to live with us when she doesn't know but I can't - I can't look at her without thinking about - the smell and the way her face looked and her eyes in those - those fucking pictures?