[A grin slowly spreads over her mouth.] After a rocky start. [Her hands play with her blanket, twisting it between her fingers.] You... actually think I'm a different person? You don't think I'm just Max gone mad? [She cuts off any answer Chloe might have, not willing to hear it, speaking faster like an excited kid.] It's Miramax. Like the... well, you know. I think it's kinda cute.
[She finishes that with a laugh.]
And for the record, she better like you more. Wonderland-Chloe barely ever gave me the time of day.
You seem pretty sure of it. So there’s no reason I shouldn’t believe you. [ There’s a second as her name sinks in, the pun more than clear, and she can’t stop herself from laughing. She covers her mouth to try and keep it quiet so that she doesn’t disturb other people who are trying to laugh, but fuck, it feels good to actually laugh. ]
I like it. And thanks. I dunno if Other Me had as much time to get over her hang ups with you, but I’m glad I’m at least better than her at something.
[The grin only gets wider as Chloe laughs.] Right? It just fits. [At some point she finds herself laughing, too. Maybe that cookie works fast after all...
But the laughter quickly fades as Chloe talks.]
I saw her once. Once. We played volleyball. I had to rewind because she didn't like me at first, and...
[...This feels strange.]
D-do you know, I think every time someone leaves Wonderland, their Mirror gets unmade? So... technically I'm already dead? [She looks dead on Chloe and there's a sadness in her expression, and she's starting to regret stuffing down that cookie so quickly.] Not even dead. Unmade. That's what the Real-Things called it. So I'm just an... echo of someone that wasn't even a someone. She was just... a thing. Something made and unmade.
[ Chloe's laughter dies rather abruptly when she starts talking about getting unmade. She watches her with much more sobriety than she's had since she walked into the tents, her forehead creased as she takes in each word, face falling.
Technically I'm already dead.
Those words hit her harder than they have any right to, the connection clear enough for her, the fact that Miramax understands the fear in having nothing to go back to. But unlike Chloe, she has no choice; no alternative to stay in Deerington forever, no ability to hold off the inevitable or escape to some other world like so many keep offering her.
She swallows roughly, reaching out quickly to grab onto her hand and squeeze it tightly in her own. ]
Hey. You're not - ... You're not a thing. You've got your own thoughts, right? Your own feelings? A personality that's... definitely not Max's.
[ She looks down at their hands, the way her pale and sickly skin looks against Chloe's. ]
You're your own person and that's just as real as anything else, no matter where you came from.
[Mirror-Max tightens her grip on Chloe's hand as hard as she can. It's still stupidly weak. And it's far more desperate than she'd care to admit.
She shrugs.]
Maybe. I dunno. [She shrugs again.] Maybe it doesn't matter. I just popped in and now I'm popping out, and who cares, right? I'm the... the five minute bathroom stop in the middle of a cool roadtrip. I'm a loading screen. A fucking commercial break. [She's blinking back tears.] I always thought I'd be more than that. I thought I could be, but...
[She wipes roughly at her eyes, turning her head away.]
Man, Price, what the hell did you put in those cookies?
[ Even though she's accepted Miramax as a different person, it's still Max she sees crying, still her best friend hurting in front of her, and she feels helpless to make it any better. What was she supposed to say to that? What could possibly make it easier to feel like you were going to just stop existing?
She can't even comfort herself over it. Let alone anyone else. ]
Told you not to eat a whole one. [ It's said with a weak amount of humor to it, an attempt at levity that she doesn't quite nail. ]
And I care. Okay? Even after all this shit, I'll care.
Yeah, you look like you really don’t give a shit, Miramax. [ It’s said with as much sarcasm as she can muster at the moment. Weaker than normal, but clear she doesn’t buy it for a second. ]
No one should have to face this kind of shit. It’s cruel that you get these small glimpses of life outside of… wherever you came from and then it just gets ripped away from you like that. You might be a little rough around the edges, but I’d be a fucking hypocrite if I said that meant you deserved to die. I -
[ A breath. ]
I care because even if you’re some reflection of Max’s personality or a fragment of her stupidly broken mind or whatever else, you’re still a Max, your own Max, and that means we’re friends and you’re stuck with it. I care because if you weren’t sick as fuck, I’d take you up on those offers to go party and tear up the town, because it sounds like fun, and if things had been different, I probably would have thought you were cool as shit from the start without all the bullshit drama in between.
[ She reaches out, scooting closer to the bed so she can cup Max’s cheek in her hand carefully. ]
I care because … you’re a person. And people are worth caring about.
...She had no idea Chloe felt like that. Or rather, she'd never really believed it until now. There are still tears in her eyes, but she blinks a few times and they're gone. And a few moments of silence pass.
And then a few more.
It seems that Miramax is, for once, out of things to say.
She reaches up and gently takes Chloe's hand, pulling it away from her cheek, still staring.]
...Thanks, Chloe.
[If she were a more open person, she'd say something about how understood she feels. About how the warmth of being appreciated, being validated, makes the pain of her sickness ebb. Or maybe it's the snacks Chloe brought. In any case, another moment passes before a small smirk spreads over Miramax's lips.]
You're so sappy you could be a tree. [Her tone has it's usual sharpness, but also a more than a little fondness in it.] Do you think I can emotionally manipulate you into doing a bunch of other things for me too?
[ She gives a nod at the thanks, letting the silence drag out afterward, figuring it was maybe necessary. Besides, she hardly ever talks that seriously with that much to say all at once. Not talking is kind of like rebooting, clearing the systems, getting herself back on track.
There's a small snort at the teasing, going to lean back in her chair again and sticking her hands behind her head as she looks at her with a smirk. ]
Don't push your luck, buddy. My heart might've grown two sizes today, but I'm still a bitch.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2019-03-10 02:22 am (UTC)[She finishes that with a laugh.]
And for the record, she better like you more. Wonderland-Chloe barely ever gave me the time of day.
no subject
Date: 2019-03-12 03:51 am (UTC)I like it. And thanks. I dunno if Other Me had as much time to get over her hang ups with you, but I’m glad I’m at least better than her at something.
no subject
Date: 2019-03-12 04:16 am (UTC)But the laughter quickly fades as Chloe talks.]
I saw her once. Once. We played volleyball. I had to rewind because she didn't like me at first, and...
[...This feels strange.]
D-do you know, I think every time someone leaves Wonderland, their Mirror gets unmade? So... technically I'm already dead? [She looks dead on Chloe and there's a sadness in her expression, and she's starting to regret stuffing down that cookie so quickly.] Not even dead. Unmade. That's what the Real-Things called it. So I'm just an... echo of someone that wasn't even a someone. She was just... a thing. Something made and unmade.
[She gulps heavily.]
no subject
Date: 2019-03-13 03:32 am (UTC)Technically I'm already dead.
Those words hit her harder than they have any right to, the connection clear enough for her, the fact that Miramax understands the fear in having nothing to go back to. But unlike Chloe, she has no choice; no alternative to stay in Deerington forever, no ability to hold off the inevitable or escape to some other world like so many keep offering her.
She swallows roughly, reaching out quickly to grab onto her hand and squeeze it tightly in her own. ]
Hey. You're not - ... You're not a thing. You've got your own thoughts, right? Your own feelings? A personality that's... definitely not Max's.
[ She looks down at their hands, the way her pale and sickly skin looks against Chloe's. ]
You're your own person and that's just as real as anything else, no matter where you came from.
no subject
Date: 2019-03-13 05:02 pm (UTC)She shrugs.]
Maybe. I dunno. [She shrugs again.] Maybe it doesn't matter. I just popped in and now I'm popping out, and who cares, right? I'm the... the five minute bathroom stop in the middle of a cool roadtrip. I'm a loading screen. A fucking commercial break. [She's blinking back tears.] I always thought I'd be more than that. I thought I could be, but...
[She wipes roughly at her eyes, turning her head away.]
Man, Price, what the hell did you put in those cookies?
[Sure. Blame the cookies.]
no subject
Date: 2019-03-15 03:55 am (UTC)She can't even comfort herself over it. Let alone anyone else. ]
Told you not to eat a whole one. [ It's said with a weak amount of humor to it, an attempt at levity that she doesn't quite nail. ]
And I care. Okay? Even after all this shit, I'll care.
no subject
Date: 2019-03-16 01:50 am (UTC)[But her tone isn't accusatory. On the contrary, she sounds very much like she's looking for a reason to believe it.]
I don't even care.
[She says that with tears in her eyes. With a waver in her voice. With a soft, but desperate grip on Chloe's hand.
She's lying.]
no subject
Date: 2019-03-16 09:51 pm (UTC)No one should have to face this kind of shit. It’s cruel that you get these small glimpses of life outside of… wherever you came from and then it just gets ripped away from you like that. You might be a little rough around the edges, but I’d be a fucking hypocrite if I said that meant you deserved to die. I -
[ A breath. ]
I care because even if you’re some reflection of Max’s personality or a fragment of her stupidly broken mind or whatever else, you’re still a Max, your own Max, and that means we’re friends and you’re stuck with it. I care because if you weren’t sick as fuck, I’d take you up on those offers to go party and tear up the town, because it sounds like fun, and if things had been different, I probably would have thought you were cool as shit from the start without all the bullshit drama in between.
[ She reaches out, scooting closer to the bed so she can cup Max’s cheek in her hand carefully. ]
I care because … you’re a person. And people are worth caring about.
no subject
Date: 2019-03-18 03:11 pm (UTC)...She had no idea Chloe felt like that. Or rather, she'd never really believed it until now. There are still tears in her eyes, but she blinks a few times and they're gone. And a few moments of silence pass.
And then a few more.
It seems that Miramax is, for once, out of things to say.
She reaches up and gently takes Chloe's hand, pulling it away from her cheek, still staring.]
...Thanks, Chloe.
[If she were a more open person, she'd say something about how understood she feels. About how the warmth of being appreciated, being validated, makes the pain of her sickness ebb. Or maybe it's the snacks Chloe brought. In any case, another moment passes before a small smirk spreads over Miramax's lips.]
You're so sappy you could be a tree. [Her tone has it's usual sharpness, but also a more than a little fondness in it.] Do you think I can emotionally manipulate you into doing a bunch of other things for me too?
no subject
Date: 2019-03-20 08:47 pm (UTC)There's a small snort at the teasing, going to lean back in her chair again and sticking her hands behind her head as she looks at her with a smirk. ]
Don't push your luck, buddy. My heart might've grown two sizes today, but I'm still a bitch.